What kind of mood ???

One year once funeral coming soon.. ken, michelle, anna, nick, bryan, jordan, kim and shryne..... eight, just left 8 of us only... where the others 10 pl going ?? its been 6 years edi... people coming its getting less n less.. this 6 years a lot of thing happen.. i lost a lot of thing, i lost my fren, my career, my true love again and again.. its 3rd time i lost my dearest man last year.. its my revenge for what i've done for the pass.. what should i talk to them when i see them since the worst mistake i make last year? time go so fast, its almost 1 year edi.. its 1st time i so blur choose not listen to them, make them sad n worry abt me again n again.. when i get hurt, they worry me like hell keep on asking am i fine and take good care of me when i back from the hell place.. i know im so selfish and childish always don like 2 face the truth when somethng unhappy happen, i jus know hide behind of u all only.. i feel so guilty when everytime think of babe postpone his career at singapore jus becos of me.. im sorry babe.. hmm, now i think i know wat to tel u when i meet u edi.. hahax.. i think u'll be very proud of me when u hear wat i've done n learn for this 1 year.. miss u all so much, and also the life of hip hop..